Miss the Boat

Anyone working in this field will be familiar with the cry “I don’t know what I’m supposed to be doing” – very often from their own mouth, because many Spiritual workers worry that they have come here to do something special and they’ll somehow miss the boat.

My advice is to stop worrying right now! I’ll tell you why.

In the last two weeks something so unexpected has happened that I’m still pinching myself. It doesn’t revolve around television or getting published, the top two ways you expect a break to happen, yet it feels so right and I have one happy Guide at my disposal.

The interesting thing is that for the third time the opportunity was delivered into my front room.

When I first found this path it was via a friend who showed me a different way of thinking that helped me to significantly change my life. As a result I spent a lot of time reading and researching, yet I had no thought of ever working in the field. In fact I didn’t know there was a field; I thought there was only Doris Stokes.

When my Mediumship suddenly switched itself on at the age of 34 it was totally unexpected and I had no idea what to do. I just couldn’t imagine how I would work with or use this new ability.

Yet I am now a full-time working Medium, writer, inspirational speaker and Life Coach, and it all happened not by accident or design, but exactly as and when it was meant to happen – despite me wanting it all and wanting it now.

My Guides kept telling me to wait and reassured me that the right thing would happen, and although I have appreciated their support more than I can tell you if I’m honest sometimes I wanted to throw my toys out of the pram.

I pushed and I pushed and I tried and I tried, terrified that I would miss my life purpose, yet each time the Spirit World has wanted to bring about the next step on my path they have reached straight into my own home to do that. Not to my doorstep, right slap bang into my living room.

The first time was just after I’d had a necessary break from my Mediumship work. I came to the point of wanting to work again but everywhere I went, every Medium I bumped into told me that I would one day be a worker but “the time is not now” or “it won’t happen before it happens”.

I knew that the messages were right and I did my best to bear it gracefully, but it was really hard and I got to the point that I couldn’t wait for something, anything, to happen. I felt desperate to work.

In December 2004 I changed jobs, and that Christmas I walked into my living room, switched on the TV and popped out to put the kettle on. As I walked back into the room and looked at the television screen the thought popped into my head “you’re important to me”.

On the screen were two men I had never seen before. At that moment the commercial break came on and up popped “The Best of British Mediums”. I was so excited; I hadn’t seen a Medium work since the late, great Doris Stokes. So I turned up the sound and spent the next three-quarters of an hour absolutely fascinated.

At the end of the show I found myself giggling at the idea that those two well known television Mediums could possibly be important to me. There I was living in a small town in Wiltshire with no connections whatsoever to the field, and they were going to be important to me. I couldn’t think how that might happen so I put it out of my mind.

Two months later as part of my new job I had cause to go and visit a lady in Bath and it turned out that this lady was a trained counsellor and practising Medium.

Naturally I asked her how she had become a Medium, and she said that she had trained with one of the two men on the television. I practically fell off my chair. However, triumph turned immediately to disappointment when I discovered that this Medium did all his courses abroad, a plane ride (shudder) away.

I thought “blast” (or words to that effect), sighed, put it out of my mind again and got on with my job. Until about 2 months later when it suddenly occurred to me that the other Medium might have a website.

He did and he was doing an introductory day right in the middle of London, which was good as I could cope with a car ride especially when my husband was driving.

So I went on the course and that led to me doing a lot of training with this man and his many other amazing Mediums. So I can confirm that one of the men on the telly was indeed important to me. Funnily enough I’ve met the other one now and he’s just starting training in the UK.

Example two came when I got myself into the wrong development circle and flatly refused to leave. Again, Medium after Medium told me that I had to leave, and again they were totally right but it made me very sad.

Whether or not it was the right circle for me I did love the circle leader and the members of the group, and although things went from bad to worse when I wouldn’t walk out I do know that at a deeper level what happened next was necessary in order to make me leave.

After a few weeks of stubbornness my television started to switch itself on and off at will so I called a local repair shop who loaned us a television and took ours in for a bit of TLC, where it promptly behaved impeccably for over a week. Something I told the circle members.

The day before the next meeting I got a strong message from my Guide that I was going to be in trouble the next night and so were 2 other circle members.

That afternoon I received a call from the workshop to say that the set had started turning itself on an off, they had identified the fault and we needed a new one.

I don’t want to go into the story too much, but briefly one of the circle members was going to have their first go at Trance Mediumship. They did so and passed a message to each circle member, and the three I was told would be in trouble – including me – were told off in a way I can only describe as unspiritual.

I was told that my television wasn’t broken (me who was facing a £500 bill for a new set) and Spirit had actually been “playing with it” in order to get my attention but I wasn’t listening. Complete rubbish of course.

Spirit can be quite straightforward and they will give you a gentle shove if you need one, but they are never rude or unkind, they don’t lie and they’re not stupid. The message I was given made them sound to be all these things and that wasn’t only unfair it was untrue.

They weren’t trying to contact me through a television, because they would have been perfectly capable of switching the loaned set on and off as well.

As an aside – it’s always wise to get an electrician to check out malfunctioning equipment before you start blaming Spirit!

Anyway, this showed me something I hadn’t suspected about the attitude within the circle and the style of teaching. So again Spirit changed my life via the television but this time using it as a tool for someone to word their own prejudices and inadvertently bring about the right result.

Lastly, two weeks ago a dear friend walked into my lounge and told me that she’d gone somewhere to look for ordinary, everyday work, and in fact a brilliant opportunity for the two of us had landed right in her lap.

I hope you take the clear message from this not to panic about your work or ever feel that you’re missing a point. Sometimes the Spirit World can be kind as in examples 1 and 3, and sometimes a little firmer – as with example 2, but they will always, but always, reach you when they want to and they will make themselves crystal clear.

Your role is to come up with ideas, meet new people, try new things, allow doors to be closed if that’s the right thing for your greater good and give in gracefully (good luck with that part).

You also have to be ready to accept when a good thing has happened and say thank you – then get on with making it work.

They can advise and guide you but the Spirit World can’t make it work for you, that’s your part in the cosmic scheme of things.

So enjoy your journey, love your work, and don’t try to push your life faster than it’s meant to go. Most importantly, trust that you will achieve what you intended to achieve before you came here providing you go out there and give the Spirit World the means and opportunity to act on your behalf.

Wishing you happy days and blissful nights

© Deb Hawken - First published in Silent Voices 2010